Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Burning at the Bottom

I don't sit still well. I have wondered if I suffer from ADD, ADHD, severe boredom or possibly I really just don't have enough practice sitting still. In any case, I have tried to improve. I have practiced sitting still, be it in class, forcing myself to sit 100% still and focused, however, this was to little avail, I still have the habit of moving. Constantly.
As my life has continued I am entering into the work world. I find my habit following me and starting to change my work philosophies. I seem to be unable to sit still. My first jobs had me outdoors, moving, jumping and running. My later jobs found me running and driving often. Now, in my current job I seem to be physically moving less and in status trying to move more. I have perused promotions and connections more than ever with my eyes set on the future. I refuse to let my legs stand when I could run. I refuse to fall when I could fly. I refuse to burn at the bottom when I can climb to the top.
Of course, you can't breath at the  top of a mountain without training and survival of the fittest is also survival of the most prepared. In my life, however I am learning to try to learn faster, listen more and ask more questions. This new "other person" focused way of doing life has been leading to other people who are more willing to talk, more willing to wait and more willing to help.
As I've said before, I don't know, and in this case I don't know of focusing on others and refusing to sit still will really help my life in the long run or even at all, but as of right now that's a risk I'm willing to take.

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